Let’s just be honest this entire thing STINKS! Everything is being cancelled….from baby showers…to weddings…and much more. There have also been cancelled fertility treatments…for those of you who have had cycles cancelled, I am so sorry to hear that you had to cancel and are having to wait longer. All of the posts about the coronavirus baby boom…please remember there are those who are not going to be able to get pregnant due to the virus.

As for me, finding any craving foods has been horrible and I can’t get food I want on a whim if I have a craving. We worked hard for this pregnancy…surgeries…IVF…waiting and waiting. We are pregnant and want to celebrate! It is so hard to celebrate right now when you are under stay at home orders. My husband and I are both essential employees, so we are still working/leaving the house for work. Which has me taking my temperature more than I probably should…better safe than sorry. I am lucky to have supervisors that care and try to protect me as much as possible. The hardest part for us right now is my husband is now allowed to any appointments. He is having to miss ultrasounds and they are not allowing recording or facetime during the ultrasounds. I feel lonely at appointments now and the ultrasounds are not a fun experience like they should be. It is so hard to enjoy it without him with me. I feel like he is missing out on something so important. He is missing her movements and getting to see her in real time. At this point, I should just be lucky I got to complete my cycle and lucky that I am pregnant….blessed that out first round of IVF was successful… and most days, this is how I feel. Somedays, it gets overwhelming and it gets to me. I have already had to delay/postpone baby shower events…even though I was stubborn and did not want to change any of the dates. I am eager to celebrate little Olivia. The pandemic has caused added stress and anxiety to this pregnancy. I feel like I can’t go out and do fun shopping things for baby stuff/maternity stuff. I am confined to my home and work (walks outside too but that doesn’t always help). I was hoping I would get to enjoy the celebration of being pregnant. I know that no matter what I will celebrate in any way I can (even if it requires a virtual baby shower)…but it just isn’t the same. I have had a few breakdowns and bad days where I feel like it shouldn’t be this way after all that we have been through….in those same moments I have to remind myself those who have tried harder and been unsuccessful and the ones who had canceled cycles/don’t get this moment for a while longer. I need to remind myself to count my blessings. My husband has been amazing through all of this.

Little Miss Olivia has been through a lot to be here…in this moment in our lives… she was created in a petri dish and frozen. Then she was thawed and implanted. Now, she is surviving a global pandemic…keep on fighting our little fighter! We can’t wait to meet this strong tiny human of ours! 

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